I deactivated my Facebook account around the end of October last year. For the rest of 2011, I became so active in Twitter, another social networking site I’m patronizing.
With Twitter, I began talking to myself online a lot. Twitter began filling the gap between me and the social networking world. I posted one-liners to my heart’s content with fewer readership than Facebook. I even wrote a brief comment about it which was featured in Cosmopolitan Philippines.
I originally intended to go back to Facebook once I get my broken pieces back. I thought I was ready. With the new year just in, I wanted to revamp and revive my Facebook account just like what I did to this blog.
So today, I tried to log in to my account and see for myself what I was really missing. I tried several times since I completely forgot what my password was.
That happens to me. Each time I want to forget, I consciously forget and really forget. I don’t know if there is any scientific explanation to that phenomenon but I call it ‘selective memory.’ I remember only the things I want to remember, and quite vividly. And shove into the deepest and darkest recesses of my memory all those which I would want to forget.
When I looked at my profile, there was this pinch in my heart. Facebook once chronicled my happiest days. I found my long lost friends in Facebook. I reconnected with old friends and continued connecting with present and new-found friends.
We have the option to hibernate. We likewise have the option to delete. And that’s what the Delete button is for, right?
For the second time in my life, I want to hibernate. Hide from everything. Just disappear from everybody else’s lives.
I wanted to delete my answers to the daily “What’s on your mind?” question. I wanted to delete photos from my albums and untag my photos from my friends’ albums. But I did not have the courage to do so. Not yet.
I think I’ll give myself some more time. More time to recover, and more time to accept things as they are. . I think I’ll be back on Facebook at the Appointed Time. Maybe. Just maybe.
Meanwhile, I pressed the Deactivate Button. Again. Reasoning out that ‘this is but temporary.’
After all, goodbye doesn’t mean forever, right?
P.S. On a lighter note, there are other ways to get in touch with me. That’s what technology is for, right? Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org. Follow me on twitter at twitter.com/handpaintedsky. Or better yet, read about me here at handpaintedsky.wordpress.com. See you around! 🙂
P.S. My ‘selective memory theory’ is backed by science and is accordingly called ‘flashbulb moment.’ Read about it here.